one tip to dealing with Low self esteem
It won’t be a hyperbole if I dubbed my high school days “The weird ages”, being in an almost all white Canadian high school, not only did I feel ugly, for some odd reason I thought straightening my dark curly hair would make me look better but it didn’t. I was the scorekeeper for the basketball games, the bench warmer for volleyball and I bet if we had a football team I would’ve been the water boy. In retrospect, there’re many things I could identify as key causes for those stinking thoughts but nevertheless, I’d like to think of myself now as “ugly duckling turned handsome swan” 😀
I’m no advocate for excessive narcism or becoming an imposter but you can’t truly love someone else, till you’ve learned how to love and appreciate yourself. More to this, how you perceive yourself tends to be how you perceive others, and our image of self is often reflected back to us, so with this in mind the importance of having a proper self-image becomes imperative. I’d be lying if I said this was an overnight process for me, far from that, it took years of learning and understanding my value as a person.
One of the specific things I learned in 2018 was the “Dress to impress code”. I think I got this from Napoleon Hill’s book “Think and grow rich” wherein he said “ don’t dress for the job you have, dress for the job you want” and as cheesy as this quote was, there seemed to be a psychological connection between how I presented myself and how I felt about me. I started suiting up to meetings and maintaining a proper hair cut (going to the barber every week didn’t seem like the wisest financial decision at my level then so I got a machine and gave myself weekly haircuts). Interestingly enough, It worked like a charm. My confidence was through the roof, I became more passionate about the work I did and the results affirmed this change.
Everyone’s different thus this isn’t a one size fits all solution, I think the first thing is identifying where the problem is, what’s the cause? and what one thing could be done now to steer things in the right direction.
At the end of the day what matters most is what’s on the inside, understanding that THERE HAS NEVER BEEN ANYONE LIKE YOU, THE IS NOT ONE LIKE YOU AND THERE’LL NEVER BE ANOTHER YOU. So go ahead and compliment the value you bring to this world with them good looks, like mama said, “LOOK GOOD, FEEL GOOD”.